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Painted Desperation

by Reward

/
1.
Seep 05:16
Collected regrets, gathered through time The comfort that I preach is buried by the process And I can't forget the days that I spent Dodging caskets in my path Now I Call them my home Complacency Is my crutch As the silence of night flows through my mind I will seek the smallest hint of light Until my regret slowly tears me apart from the inside out I'll lay defeated and helpless I'm wearing down to dust, solace is a must As I watch myself waste away in the rearview I'm grinding down my teeth, compelled to bear this hell That I chose for my self And I Call it my home Complacency Is my crutch As the silence of night flows through my mind I will seek the smallest hint of light Until my regret slowly tears me apart from the inside out I'll lay defeated and helpless I've buried myself here And I can't be forgiven One last breath of regret Stay silent let it seep in As the silence of night flows through my mind I will seek the smallest hint of light Until my regret slowly tears me apart from the inside out I'll lay defeated and helpless
2.
Soft Teeth 03:30
Shit keeps piling up and it’s been wearing down my crutches There’s no end in sight And I’m losing my grasp on what’s been in mind It’s casting its shadows on me And it’s all just lies, and it’s all just lines They’re shoving down my throat And I can’t choke it down, can’t come to terms I’m broken but I can’t find the words Can’t find a path ahead And I can’t be trusted with myself It’s hard enough on my own I’m fighting to let go Of empty thoughts and broken dreams My troubled mind could use some peace Can’t find a path ahead And I can’t be trusted with myself Can’t find a path ahead And I can’t be trusted with myself
3.
Teamocil 04:16
Let your body lay restless, I’ll keep mine shaking through the night You can toss and turn and try to believe that this will all work out But all I am is an empty bed, another worthless place to rest your head To ignore the days as they pass by and hide from another boy I should have never let you in Torn apart from the inside out There’s nowhere to go When you depend on someone else You’ve been sick, asleep, or drunk for weeks and it’s killing me what I see in you Divided by the truth – you’ve stretched beyond your shoes – what did I do? You took me for granted while he took you to bed And I gave you some credit but for now I’m spent I should have never let you in Torn apart from the inside out There’s nowhere to go When you depend on someone else If I’m alright, then you’re what’s wrong And if I’m held back you’re what’s dragging me down
4.
Bob 05:23
Every day, I find my head is buried in the ground again I can't see past the problems in my mind And every day is a miracle through your eyes You watch the sun break through the clouds, and cherish every moment in it The window's closing on your fragile mental state I see the life leaving your eyes with each passing day I can't even think of you without a smile lighting up your face I'm just the opposite -- I'm lost within myself I'm burdened by regret, you never sin you don't repent But still you live your life forever trapped within your mind The window's closing on your fragile mental state I see the life leaving your eyes with each passing day Just like the sun that sets on you every night, your light will dissipate Leaving darkness in your mind forever And I can see you sinking deeper Every time you close your eyes you're drifting further And I can see your spirit fading But keep your eyes to the rising sun; I need a hero The window's closing on your fragile mental state I see the life leaving your eyes with each passing day Just like the sun that sets on you every night, your light will dissipate Leaving darkness in your mind forever
5.
Hooked 04:10
My empty heart is lost for you to find This haunting loneliness in my eyes My dull and distraught, vulnerable thoughts Have held me captive all these years So go ahead, cut me open, take a look inside I always need what I can't have I find your eyes and never get enough Painting desperation, fill my hollow mind (I don't want this, I need it) Take an axe to my back; release the tension from my spine Watch my body unwind upon the floor before your eyes Gasping for life, the frigid air cuts my gums like a knife But it's alright -- I'll just lay here and wait to die I find your eyes and never get enough Painting desperation, fill my hollow mind (I don't want this, I need it) There's you, there's nothing I can do It's where I go to hide (I don't want this, I need it) It's you It's you and I There's nothing else keeping me alive

about

Written in the summer of 2013.
Recorded at Overlook Studios in the fall of 2013-winter of 2014.

credits

released June 24, 2014

Recorded and Produced by Bruce Wiegner.
Mastered by Jay Maas.
Released on Mutant League Records June 24th, 2014.

All songs written and performed by Reward.

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Reward Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

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